art can't hurt

for the love of red shoes

saturday morning begins a 24-hour art auction of massive proportions. it is to raise funds to help out with medical expenses for a dear friend of mine who was recently diagnosed with breast cancer and is now undergoing chemo. as an artist, small business owner, single mother and vintage junkie, catherine is a gal after my own heart! she is the owner and artist-extraordinaire behind the shop red shoes homegoods where you will find some of the most amazing art to decorate your abode. catherine and i met thru blogging many years ago, finally met in person, and from that point on we have stayed in touch and kept up with each others family's, life and general crazy creative goings on. 

i am donating two pieces of my art to the auction for cath: a 36"x36" gallery wrap canvas {BEAUTIFUL} as well as an 11"x14" print {FIGHT LIKE A GIRL} that i designed specifically for this event. it is my take on breast cancer support & awareness but applies to women everywhere. be your own strong woman.

100% of all money received during the auction april 26th goes to catherine's medical expenses, but you can also click on that link to read more about cath and donate directly to her 'you caring' site. to view and purchase any of the art during the auction on saturday, april 26th you can click here: @auctionforcatherine or follow that account if you're already on instagram. 

i am so excited to be a part of this event. it has encouraged me to shed some of my insecurities about putting my work out there and catherine has continued to be an amazing friend and supporter - even going so far as to text me wise thoughts while she's all looped up on chemo drugs ;)

the pieces shown above are available from my online shop art can't hurt, along with many other pieces coming soon. in addition to donating the two pieces above, i am also donating 50% of all proceeds from sales in my online shop of all {FIGHT LIKE A GIRL} prints & canvases from april 26th thru may 10th to catherine. please consider supporting her with your donations and keep her in your heart and prayers. 

be well miss c! three rounds down - only three to go! you've got this! XO

{friday} april 25th, 2014

a special day

been going...doing...making...non-stop since 5am. taking a moment now to *stop* and *breathe* and *give thanks*. 67 years ago today my mom was born. wife, mother, teacher, friend, nana, neighbor, mentor, sister, daughter, two-time cancer survivor - she is the strongest woman i know. she is a godly-woman. she is a woman of prayer. she laughs and the leaves dance. her hugs make me feel the safest. i am so blessed to call her mine and to still have her here on earth beside me. happy birthday mom! i love you and the ways you still teach me so much! XOXO

{thursday} april 24, 2014

that time when hubby spent two days making candles

some time ago my husband and i both became unemployed. on the same day. to say it was devastating is the understatement of the year. but worse things have happened – a job is not your identity. it brought us closer together and we decided that we would not let this weigh us down.

did it happen right away? noooooooo. i can count a few days in the first week that neither hubby nor i got out of our pjs. the littlest family member went sans bathtime for days on end. dishes piled up in the sink and an unconscious act on my part of avoiding public places (aka the grocery store) led our kids to back to back meals of macaroni and cheese. blech! just letting everything sink in and for us to process things took time. 

but we rallied around in short order.

it was a conscious decision on our part to make our own sunshine.

things started to look up rather quickly after that and hubby went on a number of interviews. a few offers came in but he was holding out hope for one job in particular. waiting….and waiting….two interviews in to it all and still waiting. in the meantime we took a huge leap of faith and he turned down another big job offer. what the WHAT?! i know. but we were praying for the first job; the right job - that not only fit him but fit our family for the long term.

in those days of waiting the anxiety ate at us slowly. we were snowed in for much of this time and i caught hubby literally pacing a few times. finally, after many phone calls and emails it came down to crunch time and he received word that he should expect a call within 48 hours from the company with a contract offer.

time has never crawled more slowly. i didn’t know how to help, and not being the most patient person in the world myself i finally just blurted out to hubby “why don’t you go make some candles or something.” out of thin air that is what came to me. i have no answer why. nor can i explain the fact that he listened, and took me seriously. so seriously, in fact, that within a matter of two hours our kitchen had become a make-shift candle factory.

it was quite possibly the single most bizarre thing for my hubby to do but it worked! he was busy, determined and focused to get all the scents, colors and wax measurements just right. and he was enjoying himself! by the end of the day my kitchen counter was lined with almost a dozen scented candles. there were pomegranate, wild fern and sweet pea scents drifting around. my favorite is the mocha colored candle with the wooden wick that crackles as it burns – hubby dubbed it 'heminway' and it smells heavenly. 

who knew. i certainly didn’t see all that coming.  that’s just the thing though – neither of us saw a lot of what has happened in the past few months coming and yet in the bigger picture it was all meant to be; candle-making included. how often are we all blindsided by life and left wandering and wondering. but blessings can be hidden in the strangest of places if we are open to receiving them. hard work will pay off in the end. God is good, even when the path in front of you seems to have turned to dust and blown away. it’s not really disappeared at all. 

growing up, my mother would light a candle at our house when she had a special prayer concern. to this day it is not unusual to end a phone call with my mom and hear her say “i will light a candle”. both metaphorically and literally, that has always been something i could count on and it has meant so much.

that day, after hubby lept with both feet and consumed himself with melting wax and concocting various recipes in order to save himself from his own anxiety, we selected one of the newly poured candles and we lit it.

the next day he got the call and accepted his new job.

if it weren’t for those candles we all might just have gone stir crazy during those 48 hours. but sometimes it begins with some homemade sunshine of your own doing. blessings abound.

{sunday} april 13, 2014

 

the ever elusive balance

lately finding balance has been something of a struggle. for this girl who has always worked outside the home, not currently having employment has me in a twilight zone. home life now seems like it was easier when loads of laundry, kids homework and dirty dishes had to be squeezed into the wee hours of mornings and nights of full days where ongoing work projects and encroaching deadlines were priority.

i used to inwardly roll my eyes when i would hear a stay-at-home mom friend mention how stressed she was and how there wasn’t enough time in the day to get everything done. If she only knew….i would think to myself.

i was that judgemental working mom. now the shoe’s on the other foot and let me be the first to put my foot in my mouth. methaphorically, of course.

so may i offer my apologies to all stay-at-home moms, for being judgemental. i am truly and sincerely sorry. 

how is it the minutes and hours whir by at a faster rate when “all you’re doing” is chasing a toddler around while completing household chores. suddenly chores i used to complete in my free moments went from mundane to monumental. add to that my on-going task of sending out resumes, scheduling interviews and maintaining the occasional freelance gig and you’ve got a full-blown reality show of epic proportions.

by the time the hungry husband and kiddos come parading thru the door in the evenings asking ‘what’s for dinner’, the toddler has bested me and won. she towers over me on top of the pile of clean (and still unfolded) laundry clearly proud of the exhausted heap she has reduced me to. i cannot even claim to be a disheveled mess, because that would require me to have been ‘sheveled’ at some point that day. I don’t think three-day old jeans, hubby’s t-shirt, no makeup and a messy hair topknot constitutes ‘sheveledness’.

it was the other night, after one such day of said episodes that i’d had it. dinner was finished, homework complete, toddler in bed and everyone else winding down their routines for the night. instead of crawling up to bed feeling defeated i decided to do something for myself and i curled up on the couch with a book. one of our teenagers walked in to the room and i may or have may not have growled at them and bared my teeth – a clear sign to all child cubs that momma bear needed some alone time.  picking up tsh ovenreider’s book, 'notes from a blue bike', I dove in – mug of decaf coffee in hand.

i surfaced for air fifty-five pages later and had an epiphany. i put the book down and went to my desk. opening my laptop i went to work and promptly wrote up a shot list for the next day. (if you don't know what a shot list is google can explain it) just because i wasn’t getting up and leaving for work each day to where i was a master at time management, deadlines and details, didn’t mean i couldn’t infuse my time at home with those same skills. instead of my list looking like this: 

8:45am           P/U FLORAL & PERISHABLES

9:30am           CHECK EMAIL / REPLY TO VOICEMAILS / CONFIRM ARRIVAL TIME WITH SITE MGR.

10:00am        BOX PROPS FOR SET / TURN IN EXPENSE REPORT / MEET W/ MARKETING ABOUT                 
                       SHOWROOM SIGNAGE

11:00am        LOAD TRUCK

11:30am        LEAVE FOR SITE / P/U LUNCH FOR CREW

 

my shot list looked like this:

9:00am           CHECK EMAIL / FOLLOWUP RESUME INQUIRIES – SOPHIE MORNING SNACK
                        (APPLE/PB SLICES)

9:35am           SWAP LAUNDRY OUT & FOLD WHILE SOPH WATCHING SESAME STREET

10:15am        WINTER CLOTHES TOTES UP FROM BSMT – COATS PUT AWAY

10:50am        REDO WEEKLY MEAL PLAN

11:10am        LEAVE WITH SOPH FOR LIBRARY & MARKET

11:20am        RETURN BOOKS

11:30am        MARKET (SEE REVISED GROCERY LIST) 

12:30pm        HOME: LUNCHTIME (HAM & CHEESE ROLLUP, GRAPES)

12:45pm        CHECK EMAIL / RETURN VOICEMAILS / CALL TRACK COACH ABOUT PARENT MTG.

1:15pm          UNLOAD/LOAD DISHWASHER

i realize that this may seem over-the-top for most people. for me, however, this is all a new normal – this solo time with my toddler in which i need to find and then maintain a balance.  i want to live in the present for her sake, and mine, by not squandering the days that ‘home’ is my job.

i can also give my family better, from the food i prepare and feed them to the way in which i handle myself while doing it. slowing down and making more of our meals from scratch, now that i have more time to do so, is a way i can create balance. intentionally holding off on household chores – knowing that i have it budgeted into the day for later on during naptime – allows me to spend time focused on the important things with my toddler, like play-doh, playing with lacing cards (and then unknotting them), drawing in coloring books and discussing the social lives of all of her stuffed animals.

eureka! i’m not “cured” but holy cow did the next day ever run smoother! and at the end of the day i actually felt ACCOMPLISHED as my shot list had been completed. my family also deemed my homemade eggplant parmiagana a dinner homerun! i fell asleep that night with my head nestled in the fluff of cloud nine.

while i must give some of the credit to tsh, i can’t overlook the fact that it was me, myself and i who took the first step to making a change for the better: by taking notice that i needed some “me time”.  giving yourself credit when you do something good for you and good for others is a huge step in maintaining that ever tenuous delicate balance.

i have every intention of maintaining my daily shot lists for now. it’s worked for a couple of days now and while i don’t feel like my old self, i do recognize the woman i see in the mirror again. whether this stay-at-home gig is a long-term thing or something temporary remains to be seen. but i know the lessons that this time is teaching me are for life. 

here’s to the on-going quest for balance in life, and to not judging each other as moms – whether we work solely in the home or not. we all work. cheers!

finding joy

when faced with hard times joy can seem distant. in the midst of uncertain times you have to make your own sunshine.
i lost my job.

scary, yes. heart-breaking, yes. i love what i do for a living and am good at it. i have the awards i've won to prove it. but i can't dwell on what was if i'm going to move forward towards what will be.
today stretches out before me like a blank slate.

as i search for a new job i am putting myself back on the market as a freelance designer. i am available for commercial, corporate and residential design: showrooms, offices, product photo shoots, retail merchandising, real estate staging, home decor as well as consultations {these can be done via skype or facetime if distance is an issue}. email me if you'd like to inquire about details.

i also will be opening my bigcartel.com shop very soon with original art & creative sundries for sale. 

i would be lying if i said i wasn't scared - i'm terrified. i feel like a fish out of water. but i must do whatever it takes to make ends meet for my family's sake, if not for my own sanity.

stay tuned - joy will prevail!

{thursday} march 13, 2014

good morning

do you keep a journal? 
do you ever flip open to a page for a peek back at your own reality?
i just did and it did this momma's heart good too.

*****
21 may 2012
It’s 6:50am and the house is silent – a rarity within these four walls.

My eldest children hitched a ride to school with Nana and I just kissed my husband farewell as he breezed out of the door to work with his third cup of coffee this morning in hand.
I am left with the littlest rascal still slumbering upstairs; unusually late for her. 

In the next 30 minutes I have myself and baby to get ready before I too must leave the comfort of our home and venture into the day.
It promises to be a busy one: drop little one off to spend morning with Grandma, volunteer at ‘field day’ for a few hours (which promises to be a treat since it’s raining), mandatory meeting at work – an hours drive each way – and then picking up kiddos from school and racing to eye doctor  before they close at 3:30.
After all of that our evening will be pretty mundane with only homework and regular housework to get done.
I take that back – there is the third grade ‘market day’ project to finish up and that entails the making of 100 homemade lollipops.

 I’ve known today’s schedule for a while seeing as the different events of our lives begin layering themselves onto the calendar weeks in advance.
It requires a certain choreography to accomplish everything without forgetting something at home or missing an appointment.
To some it may seem that we live in a frenzy but I would not have it any other way.
We are LIVING and that is truly a blessing. 

I hear sweet baby babbling on the baby monitor, signaling me to go upstairs where I will be greeted by the most beautiful smile and sweet baby hugs.
I wouldn’t trade today for any other day, and I will say the same for tomorrow.
***** 

a lot of mornings around here don't go quite that smoothly.
there is the occassional squabble over someone "using up all the hot water in the shower" and then there's moments when there's no-milk-left-in-the-house-for-breakfast. 
lately since the baby is walking it's like a giant pinball machine around here with everyone dodging and weaving to avoid tripping over the weeble wobble that's no doubt chasing the cat or in to the dog's food bowl. 
it's mornings like that when i would like to hit REWIND or just go back to bed for another hour or two. but i can't. who can?

lately whenever mornings around here start to get shaky and i feel the chaos revving up i stop and repeat to myself:
have an attitude of gratitude.
it's helped me to take a pause and see in the moment all the GOOD that i'm missing by letting the little things get in my way.
looking back in my journal also reassures me that not every morning has to be or is a race.
a hefty dose of humor goes a long way too.
in these cold, dark midwestern winter months it is especially hard to kickstart my mornings, but with persistance i know that living life IN gratitude will help me.
what do you do when your house is abuzz and total bedlam?

catching up

do you ever have a moment when you run in to an old friend and suddenly you have so much swirling around in your head that you want to share, that you don't know where to begin?
i kind of feel that way right now.
so much water has passed under the bridge since i last took to cyberspace as a creative outlet.
so much good. some sad. a bunch of really amazing WOW moments too.
i guess there's some catching up to do.
all in good time. for now i must call it a night and turn the lights out on the ornaments that still adorn our home.
happy new year!

 

 

 

today

You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building nests in your hair. -Chinese proverb

We're flying into Baltimore, Maryland today. I can't help but think what today is like for so many families who are missing loved ones. A nation remembering your loss cannot be easy to bear. Reminders everywhere you turn and a constant awareness that must be impossible to escape.

I wish everyone peace today.

thanksliving

The kiddos are away for the holiday to be with their other parents.

The house is still and quiet. Not normal around here.

My mom was quite poignant in her blog post today and quite frankly her words are words to live by.

Not just one day a year.

Words that I need to take to heart - words that I hope you may consider too.

Blessings to you all!

Now hang the wreaths, put on some tinsel and ROCK THAT CHRISTMAS MUSIC 24/7!!!!!!!!!!!

**To truly enjoy the music of this video, scroll down to the green music player in the column to the left and hit its PAUSE button - or the two songs will overlap and sound like mud!**

coolest collar

We just found this new collar for Bleecker - it's the M.C. Escher design of lizards (or did he call them dragons???) It's reflective and everything! Just PERFECT for our quirky dog who likes to bark at all the recycling bins in everyones front yards when we take our walks! :)